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[personal profile] pheliskougra
This might not have been the smartest move in my life.

So, I hurt my foot yesterday. Jumped from some height, landed bad on heel and ankle. Nothing broke, but it hurts, a low level of constant pain that gets worse when I walk. Pain makes me cranky. And I can not go to see a doctor, because my health insurance plan's docs are on strike, claiming to be grossly underpaid. Oh joy.

So, deciding I should avoid walking much, I realized I could not really go grocery shopping for the week. I decided to order two pizzas and complement my diet for the next few days with fruit salad and juices I can buy at the cafeteria at work.

Sounds like a plan, right?

I called my favorite pizza place, and ordered the pizzas; deciding to spoil myself, I go for a tuna and cream cheese, and a bacon, chicken and cream cheese. Splurging with myself, I also ordered a two-liter container of ice cream, planning to relax and have some therapeutic junk food. Pizzas and ice cream arrive, I stash the ice cream in the freezer for later and grab two slices of pizza, tuna and creamy cheese. I start eating pizza always from the outer edge in, saving the central, thin end, with the most topping, for last. So, I had gone over about half of the two slices when I discovered onion bits mixed with the creamy cheese.

I have an irrational dislike of onions. Or rather, of pieces of onions, I hate the texture of onions being chewed and the sound they make. I can only use onions in seasoning if I blend them to puree.

And I have my aching foot making me cranky.

I call the pizza place and complain, even more flabbergasted since onion is not one of the listed ingredients of the tuna pizza. The person who takes the call asks me to wait, and lays down the receiver.

I wait.

And wait.

And wait.

After ten minutes (I was staring at the clock all the time, I hate to be on hold on the phone) the call drops.

Now I'm pissed, and take a few deep breathes before calling again. Mind you, nobody apologizes for the abandoned call, but, fuck it, I just want a solution to the onion thing, because I'm not paying for something I'm not eating. The pizza place person offers to send me a new, onion-less pizza.

Fifteen minutes or so later, the replacement pizza arrives, I hand over the onion-tainted one and check my new pizza.

It's burnt. All around the edges, and burnt on the underside, and it smells of burned. I knew I should have checked before the delivery guy left, but, silly me, I was thinking they would not mess up twice. I call again, and now I am agitated and unleashing the pissed-off sarcasm, because I'm hungry, disappointed, aching. Then, comes the cherry on top of the shit-sundae, apparently the delivery guy arrived back with the pizza and the person I was talking to checked it.

The following jewel was tossed at me: "Well, you did eat half the first pizza..."

I saw red for a moment.

First, I ate half of two slices. Last time I checked, half of a quarter was 1/8th, not half of the whole. Second... well, no second, it was bullshit, the person I was talking to was accusing me of trying to get free food. I told her so, and we argued a bit, pizza-employee denying saying anything even remotely related or similar to me consuming half the pizza before complaining, then saying the manager was not in and nobody could be held responsible....

I hung up.

Took the burnt tuna pizza, the untouched bacon pizza, the ice cream, loaded it in my car and drove over. When I got there, the manager/owner had arrived, and I simply handed him the whole thing, told him what had happened, and wished him a good night. He offered to return my money, and I told him I did not want it.

"But sir, I can not possibly keep your money if you are returning the food..."

I cut him. "No, you can and you will. You, this restaurant called me a scammer, so I'm buying a bit of payback for $$$ and calling you thieves. And of course, I will be taking my business elsewhere, which is a pity because I really liked your pizzas. Until tonight."

He still opened the till and tried to count out and give me back my money, but I just went back to the car and returned home. Sincerely, I hope it sticks with him, how he has money he did not earn, because someone who works for him decided to lie and call me a scammer. I really hope it sticks for a while.
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September 2012

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